Capricorn
I know you’ve had that album on repeat this week. Listen to something else so you don’t burn it out too quick.
Aquarius
Try something fun! Go for a swim in the pool or set off some fireworks. But go to Wisconsin because apparently it’s “illegal” here or something..
Pisces
Think back about a fight or disagreement you had recently. Now sit in the shower for another 40 minutes coming up with a better argument you’ll never get to use.
Aries
Been missing your ex lately? Tough. You should catch up on your work.
Taurus
You’re super hot. Just a flawless gem that everyone thinks is smart and funny. Show your confidence this week..
Gemini
Stop anonymously posting on Flirts and ask your crush out already.
Cancer
Have you been feeling overwhelmed? Treat yourself to a bath in the Hillboe tub. On second thought, maybe get that fancy latte instead.
Leo
Skip a class this week and do some work you’ve been putting off. Don’t worry, you can tell the professor a campus squirrel turned off your alarm!
Virgo
Things are going well for you lately. A little too well perhaps. Don’t take it for granted.
Libra
Your crush is definitely into you but you have to stop parking your car in the faculty lots because Pub Safe is itching to give you a ticket.
Scorpio
You’ve had a birthday recently, or maybe it’s coming up. That’s exciting. Also someone new may come into your life soon. Be suspicious.
Sagittarius
Check up on a friend you haven’t talked to recently. Also put less pressure on yourself. You’re doing the best you can.
