Horoscopes

Aries: Your season is coming to an end and what a season it was. Spend this last week doing whatever you want. Try to use your powers for good for once.

Taurus: Spent all your Cage money on poke bowls and the drink of the month? Sounds like a great time to ask that person in your class to be your sugar bestie.

Gemini: It’s hard to focus right now but try.

Cancer: Take a break from listening to “Fearless (Taylor’s version)”. You’ll do greater things than dating someone on the cross country team.

Leo: Y’all are getting ready for the summer of a lifetime. Check-in with yourself this week and see what’s up, it’s okay to be sensitive.

Virgo: … you don’t have to be right all the time. Also, it’s okay if you aren’t always busy. It’s not a competition.

Libra: Take a walk through the natty lands and ponder the great questions of this world. Wait, you already do that. Try making a decision.

Scorpio: Vulnerability is what makes us human or whatever, you should try it. 

Sagittarius: I get it, you feel trapped in this bubble. Create some adventure this week and say yes to everything. Stay sexy my fellow sags.

Capricorn: December Capricorns — why are you the way you are? No hate just a question to ask yourself. January Capricorns — not everything has to be a resume filler, don’t go to The Piper Center this week.

Aquarius: Reconnect with old friends this week. You don’t have to go through it alone.

Pisces: Stop staring at them and ask them out.

Graphics by Sadie Favour ’23