Scroll Top

Christmas celebrates capitalism


Ah, the holiday season that, in the United States, is basically restricted to Christians and Christmas. The world is filled by a cheer that, to 63 percent of us, is dazzling and perfect. I mostly jest. Even as a staunch atheist, I look forward to the Christmas season every single year, if only for the aesthetic and the fact that it makes everyone around me noticeably happier. I am annoyed that it has eclipsed every other mainstream and pagan holiday around the same time, and basically turned into a monument of consumerism in the modern world. 


There exist two very different sides of Christmas in our modern world. One is the original story of Jesus and his birth, deeply rooted in original Christian tradition. The second is everything that came after — an unrelated mythos built around Santa, his elves and reindeer, and various cold-weather creatures and snowmen that have become the haphazard mascots of companies trying to sell you something vaguely holiday-themed. 


I am not a huge fan of Christianity or late-stage capitalism. I’ve become increasingly tired of capitalism’s intrusive presence in our modern world and the corporate monolith it represents. When Christmas starts earlier each year, it’s not because of Christmas. Not because of spirituality, or tradition, or festivities, or any of the words associated with the Advent candles. It’s because the nebulous and obscured enemy — mysterious corporate executives and titans of industry — want to sell you something. Maybe I wouldn’t mind the ever-pervasive perturbance of Christmas during the latter third of the year if it truly was about spirituality, worship, and good vibes. I respect religion. I cannot respect capitalists.


The modern meaning of Christmas has been perverted by the same people that ruin everything in the modern world: corporate executives.


I, for one, will not stand for their sales propaganda’s ever-creeping insistence that Christmas start earlier and earlier. I will be joining the war on capitalism’s Christmas with pitchforks and torch raised high.


Eat the rich.

Fin Walling is from Minneapolis. Walling’s major is undeclared.