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Teague’s Top Ten tips for spring break


Spring break is on the horizon! Before we head out into the world for a week of fun, here are some great tips to ensure you get the most out of your vacation.

  1. Ignore Minnesota weather. If you are going somewhere tropical, don’t pack a jacket or pants or anything for the flight back. Be optimistic you’ll be able to keep wearing that Hawaiian shirt outside when you get back!
  2. Research local drug laws. Is marijuana legal? Is meth? What about cocaine? Make sure you’re informed so you can stock up in the right location.
  3. Rent a horse. Why rent a car when you can rent a horse? You don’t have to be 25 to do it, and hay is much cheaper than gas. 
  4. Learn Finnish. If you get lost somewhere, you’ll have a major advantage if you can find a Finn and speak to them in their native tongue.
  5. Wear as many American flags as you can. Everyone loves Americans — make sure you advertise your association to the U.S. as often as you can!
  6. Invest in some gold doubloons. It’s the only real universal form of currency.
  7. Find the local McDonalds. You’ll be somewhere new and exciting, probably with a rich history of delicious cultural dishes. Let’s be honest though, all any of us really want is a Big Mac. It doesn’t get any better than that!
  8. Bang for roof. Can’t find somewhere to stay? Meet a local and find your way into their bed for the night. (Pro tip: do this in a country with free healthcare in case you get an STD.)
  9. Bring back a cool new organism. Meet a fun animal? Fall in love with an exotic plant? Don’t be afraid to bring your new buddy back to the States!
  10. Only drink American beer. (Remember tip #5.) Don’t trust the local water! Beer is the only way to go.

Teague Peterson-McGuire is from Oconomowoc, Wisc.

His majors are film & media studies and Nordic studies.